Friday, August 22, 2014

Review: Princess Academy

Guys, I'll tell it to you straight: I want this to be required reading for like 5th or 6th graders everywhere. I just love it so much.


Miri Larendaughter feels useless. The only industry there is on Mount Eskel is quarrywork, but her father has never let her set foot in the mines, making her the only person (besides the very old and the very young) who doesn't help out with the linder. (Linder is fairly similar to marble, fyi.) The best she hopes to do is make good deals with the lowlander traders who come with food and supplies every season.

And then the bombshell drops: Mount Eskel has been divined as the home of the future princess of Danland, in accordance with the ancient tradition. Now every girl between twelve and seventeen will be forced to attend a year-long academy to teach them how to read, how to write, and how to behave, among other subjects.

None of the girls are pleased with this annoucement - how are their families supposed to mine enough linder to feed themselves if much of the workforce is gone? They comply with the decree begrudingly, though, and soon over a dozen girls are off to the old minister's house where the academy will be housed.

Their teacher is Tutor Olana, a snobby woman who's used to the finery of Asland, the capital city. She's very strict, too, and kind of a terrible teacher - she punishes a girl for speaking out of turn, and then again for not understanding the lesson she missed while in punishment. Miri studies hard, though, eventually learning more than just book lessons.

You see, the quarriers use what they call "quarry-speech" to communicate over the din of the mines. It's similar to mind-reading, and it's only ever worked in the quarry before - at least, until Miri unwittingly uses it one day in the academy. She figures out through much trial and error that it works via the linder itself, not the mines, and that the reason orphaned lowlander Britta couldn't hear it in the mines is because she doesn't have the lifelong proximity to the stone that the others do.

The tables turn on Olana once the girls put their newfound knowledge to use, and even the traders are forced to reckon with the girls when Miri realizes that linder is worth much more than the traders were giving them. Everything's going smoothly for once as the academy ball approaches, where the girls will meet the prince for the first time.

And then he leaves without choosing any of them to be his bride, leaving them stuck at the school until spring thaw.

Even worse? Bandits attack the girls a few days later, believing that one of them is the future princess and is just trying to keep it a secret. Will Miri be able to summon help from the village to save their lives? And who's the prince going to pick, anyway?

Like I said, I love this book, you guys. Miri is so relatable - she just wants to feel useful, maybe even important, and I think a lot of young teens (and maybe even twenty-somethings) can understand that. Also, everyone's sympathetic after a while. Olana's not an Umbridge-esque irredeemable villain, and Katar, one of the meaner girls, is shown to be dealing with problems of her own. I really love how Princess Academy humanizes everyone without treating the villains like special misunderstood snowflakes.

I'm also a huge fan of the writing style. The language is lyrical and reminiscent of old fairy tales without being hard to follow or overly purple. The chapters also open with snippets of lyrics from songs the characters know, which is a cute way of introducing what's going to happen, in my opinion. The one problem I have with more grown-up fantasy is that the language can get overly complex and fussy, so I love finding good children's books that tell mature stories with simpler language.

Another choice I love from this book is that - spoiler alert - Miri doesn't become the princess. The academy helps her figure out what she really does want from life, and it feels good - a nice blend of her pre-academy and post-academy lives. I appreciate that she didn't have to become royal to be happy.

Overall, Princess Academy is an amazing fairy tale. No monsters, sure, but there are plenty of "real world" problems that will keep you entertained throughout the book. Five stars.

(also, who do I need to call about making this a movie and getting cast as the lead? We are the same body type, you guys.) 

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